Jews for Jesus...
Talk about people with way too much time on their hands...
This silly mix of Jews and Christians seek to pry Jewish youth away from their beliefs and foundation by appealing to the teenage desire to rebel. They feast on instability and immaturity. Real honorable these putzes are. They are like religious child molesters. They take advantage of young people during vulnerable periods of their lives and convince them to do things they don't really want to do. They are no better than a Priest telling an altar boy the only real way to absolve all of his sins.
Jews for Jesus do a large bulk of their recruiting on college campuses accross the country. The place where teenagers specifically go to get away from their foundation and to challenge their beliefs. Not to be force-fed garbage and programmed to believe it. I never got approached by a Jews for Jesus advocate during college, but in law school and on the subway I've been approached many times. Thanks to years of Hebrew school, I often know the bible passages and their true interpretations better than the unemployed shmuck who apparently has nothing better to do other than entertain me on my ride to work or as a break from studying for law exams.
One time during the finals period of my third year in law school a couple of these degenerates ending up wandering around our law school campus. A couple of friends of mine actually brought one of the Jews for Jesus guys over to the place I was sitting in the cafeteria to talk to me. He then proceeded to gather a bunch of other law school students around the two of us just to watch the Jews for Jesus guy feel stupid. -
(I know, I'm a dork...but the satisfaction of watching this guy squirm is something I wasn't going to pass up - can you imagine, here is a guy who probably failed out of school, got his job application rejected by McDonalds, wasn't any good at anything, and maybe even contemplated suicide - and he finally found a niche by memorizing and misinterpreting bible passages to young, immature Jewish kids. Now, he finally feels like he is part of a group, a member of a team, like he belongs somewhere. He is no longer depressed because he has a goal in life, and he has other pathetic people just like him to share accomplishments with. Lo and behold he sits down next to some Jewish kid who is looking for any reason not to study for law exams, easy kill, right?... Bam! - the kid went to a Hebrew high school that gave a mandatory clinic on Christmas of Senior year about how to argue with Jews for Jesus advocates. But being that this kid's high school administration has a sense of humor, they didn't just teach him the truth, but they also taught him how to make the other guy feel stupid and insignificant to a point that he doesn't have anything to say and actually sounds a bit like Terri Schiavo - 'bblrbpbbbttt'. So anyway, this poor guy comes in high with confidence and feeling very important to his cause, and then gets completely demoralized, in front of a crowd of law school students so depressed by final exams that they seize the opportunity to partake in the destruction of another human being's self-worth. What a great afternoon that was. Almost as great as convincing the contracts professor that the elevator alarm was a fire drill and getting class dismissed an hour early, "Hey professor, remember the Seton Hall fire...? We can't take a chance..." - a very proud moment for me) -
back to the point...
About half way through with this guy it got so pathetic and embarrassing, that the friend who originally thought up this brilliant idea began to feel bad for the Jesus-loving homo that I was berating and broke through to save him by saying, "I like to have lots and lots of premarital sex... does that mean I'm going to hell?"
Anyway, where do these people come from? On a repeat of an old Howard Stern show this morning, I heard Stern refer to the Jews who are "for Jesus" as people who felt inadequate in their synagogues. They couldn't be president of their synagogue and felt left out. They figure they'll be "for Jesus" and everyone will talk about them. It's their attention-getter.
I beg to differ. To me, the people in the Synagogue who never get to be president don't become Jews for Jesus advocates... they become little league coaches. It is generally not the Jews that are active in the Jews for Jesus converting process, unless they themselves are brainwashed first.
Therefore, the originators here are in fact Christians. I will say off-the-bat, mainstream Christianity condemns Jews for Jesus. While mainstream Christianity very much believes in the conversion of Jews to Christianity, either for public policy reasons or other they say Jews for Jesus is not the way to go. Which kind of makes sense. I mean, how could you be a Jew for Jesus? It just doesn't make sense. The whole concept is stupid. Wasn't the whole foundation of Christianity a bunch of Jews for Jesus??? If that's the case, then any Jew who is indeed "for Jesus" is not a Jew for Jesus, but a Christian.
Was Paul a Christian or a Jew for Jesus? Same damn thing, right? If a Christian decided that he didn't believe in Jesus, or the Holy Trinity, but in fact believed that only one true God exists and that God rules all and has absolutely no physical attributes... would he be a Christian for Monotheism? I think not. If a terrorist rotting in an Israeli jail cell decides one day that 70 hairy Arab virgins with absolutely no sexual experience just isn't worth killing all those children for, and denounces Allah and curses Mohammad as the evil, violent, child-raping animal that he was, and decides to practice aspects of Hindu - would we call him a Muslim for cow-worship or an Islamic Fundamentalist for the golbalization of beef jerky and slurpies? No!
So there is no such thing as a Jew for Jesus. Either you are Jewish or you are not. That simple.
What can we do about this problem? This is a tough question.
Nuclear weapons are unfortunately taken out of the equation here because these people live amongst us and too many innocent lives would be lost. Some collateral damage is always expected and indeed acceptable (see Hiroshima and Nagasaki, The Bombing of), but we're talking about American lives here, not Japanese, so it's a bigger loss.
Deprogramming centers already exist. This is in that case where the child finally comes home from college to her Orthodox Jewish family and says, "Mom, Dad, Bubbe (grandma), Zaydie (grandpa), I believe in Jesus now and let me tell you why..." To which the father will often respond, "What?!? This is what I sent you to college for? Why couldn't you just be a pothead? Or at least be on one of the Girls Gone Wild Videos during a frat house party? Bring me an illegitimate child! Anything! Freakin Jesus? Jesus Christ! What's wrong with you." Zaydie won't respond because the stroke he just had has numbed his entire face to a point where he is incoherent. Bubbe can't hear and Mom already has the deprogrammer on the phone because she saw this coming.
Hand-to-Hand Combat, not in the violent sense, but rather matching the recruiting efforts with anti-Jews for Jesus missionaries. This too is problematic being that most people who would be equipped to handle this task are employed or busy trying to add some type of value to society. Occasionally schools will put together quick projects and send people into the field for a limited time to counter out the Jews for Jesus people, but it's not for a prolonged time and only has a small effect in relation to the population of the Jews for Jesus following.
There is a whole army of unemployed, no-talent, child-molesting fanatics out there. We can't defeat them, we can only hope to contain them. If you have any other thoughts on the matter, feel free to add them in the comments.
This silly mix of Jews and Christians seek to pry Jewish youth away from their beliefs and foundation by appealing to the teenage desire to rebel. They feast on instability and immaturity. Real honorable these putzes are. They are like religious child molesters. They take advantage of young people during vulnerable periods of their lives and convince them to do things they don't really want to do. They are no better than a Priest telling an altar boy the only real way to absolve all of his sins.
Jews for Jesus do a large bulk of their recruiting on college campuses accross the country. The place where teenagers specifically go to get away from their foundation and to challenge their beliefs. Not to be force-fed garbage and programmed to believe it. I never got approached by a Jews for Jesus advocate during college, but in law school and on the subway I've been approached many times. Thanks to years of Hebrew school, I often know the bible passages and their true interpretations better than the unemployed shmuck who apparently has nothing better to do other than entertain me on my ride to work or as a break from studying for law exams.
One time during the finals period of my third year in law school a couple of these degenerates ending up wandering around our law school campus. A couple of friends of mine actually brought one of the Jews for Jesus guys over to the place I was sitting in the cafeteria to talk to me. He then proceeded to gather a bunch of other law school students around the two of us just to watch the Jews for Jesus guy feel stupid. -
(I know, I'm a dork...but the satisfaction of watching this guy squirm is something I wasn't going to pass up - can you imagine, here is a guy who probably failed out of school, got his job application rejected by McDonalds, wasn't any good at anything, and maybe even contemplated suicide - and he finally found a niche by memorizing and misinterpreting bible passages to young, immature Jewish kids. Now, he finally feels like he is part of a group, a member of a team, like he belongs somewhere. He is no longer depressed because he has a goal in life, and he has other pathetic people just like him to share accomplishments with. Lo and behold he sits down next to some Jewish kid who is looking for any reason not to study for law exams, easy kill, right?... Bam! - the kid went to a Hebrew high school that gave a mandatory clinic on Christmas of Senior year about how to argue with Jews for Jesus advocates. But being that this kid's high school administration has a sense of humor, they didn't just teach him the truth, but they also taught him how to make the other guy feel stupid and insignificant to a point that he doesn't have anything to say and actually sounds a bit like Terri Schiavo - 'bblrbpbbbttt'. So anyway, this poor guy comes in high with confidence and feeling very important to his cause, and then gets completely demoralized, in front of a crowd of law school students so depressed by final exams that they seize the opportunity to partake in the destruction of another human being's self-worth. What a great afternoon that was. Almost as great as convincing the contracts professor that the elevator alarm was a fire drill and getting class dismissed an hour early, "Hey professor, remember the Seton Hall fire...? We can't take a chance..." - a very proud moment for me) -
back to the point...
About half way through with this guy it got so pathetic and embarrassing, that the friend who originally thought up this brilliant idea began to feel bad for the Jesus-loving homo that I was berating and broke through to save him by saying, "I like to have lots and lots of premarital sex... does that mean I'm going to hell?"
Anyway, where do these people come from? On a repeat of an old Howard Stern show this morning, I heard Stern refer to the Jews who are "for Jesus" as people who felt inadequate in their synagogues. They couldn't be president of their synagogue and felt left out. They figure they'll be "for Jesus" and everyone will talk about them. It's their attention-getter.
I beg to differ. To me, the people in the Synagogue who never get to be president don't become Jews for Jesus advocates... they become little league coaches. It is generally not the Jews that are active in the Jews for Jesus converting process, unless they themselves are brainwashed first.
Therefore, the originators here are in fact Christians. I will say off-the-bat, mainstream Christianity condemns Jews for Jesus. While mainstream Christianity very much believes in the conversion of Jews to Christianity, either for public policy reasons or other they say Jews for Jesus is not the way to go. Which kind of makes sense. I mean, how could you be a Jew for Jesus? It just doesn't make sense. The whole concept is stupid. Wasn't the whole foundation of Christianity a bunch of Jews for Jesus??? If that's the case, then any Jew who is indeed "for Jesus" is not a Jew for Jesus, but a Christian.
Was Paul a Christian or a Jew for Jesus? Same damn thing, right? If a Christian decided that he didn't believe in Jesus, or the Holy Trinity, but in fact believed that only one true God exists and that God rules all and has absolutely no physical attributes... would he be a Christian for Monotheism? I think not. If a terrorist rotting in an Israeli jail cell decides one day that 70 hairy Arab virgins with absolutely no sexual experience just isn't worth killing all those children for, and denounces Allah and curses Mohammad as the evil, violent, child-raping animal that he was, and decides to practice aspects of Hindu - would we call him a Muslim for cow-worship or an Islamic Fundamentalist for the golbalization of beef jerky and slurpies? No!
So there is no such thing as a Jew for Jesus. Either you are Jewish or you are not. That simple.
What can we do about this problem? This is a tough question.
Nuclear weapons are unfortunately taken out of the equation here because these people live amongst us and too many innocent lives would be lost. Some collateral damage is always expected and indeed acceptable (see Hiroshima and Nagasaki, The Bombing of), but we're talking about American lives here, not Japanese, so it's a bigger loss.
Deprogramming centers already exist. This is in that case where the child finally comes home from college to her Orthodox Jewish family and says, "Mom, Dad, Bubbe (grandma), Zaydie (grandpa), I believe in Jesus now and let me tell you why..." To which the father will often respond, "What?!? This is what I sent you to college for? Why couldn't you just be a pothead? Or at least be on one of the Girls Gone Wild Videos during a frat house party? Bring me an illegitimate child! Anything! Freakin Jesus? Jesus Christ! What's wrong with you." Zaydie won't respond because the stroke he just had has numbed his entire face to a point where he is incoherent. Bubbe can't hear and Mom already has the deprogrammer on the phone because she saw this coming.
Hand-to-Hand Combat, not in the violent sense, but rather matching the recruiting efforts with anti-Jews for Jesus missionaries. This too is problematic being that most people who would be equipped to handle this task are employed or busy trying to add some type of value to society. Occasionally schools will put together quick projects and send people into the field for a limited time to counter out the Jews for Jesus people, but it's not for a prolonged time and only has a small effect in relation to the population of the Jews for Jesus following.
There is a whole army of unemployed, no-talent, child-molesting fanatics out there. We can't defeat them, we can only hope to contain them. If you have any other thoughts on the matter, feel free to add them in the comments.
posted by EDS | 11:10 AM
3 Comments:
rock on
You are a fag...
I'm talking to you Park Ranger boy... I wouldn't read about your life as a park ranger because I'm pretty sure it involves multiple 'pants down behind the bushes with the billyclub' incidents. Not interested.
"I read over your blog and found it inquisitive..." you freaking homo!
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