Nothing Important...

Having absolutely nothing to do with anything or each other, a few quick things to note:

1. I don't like the billboard that I see on my drive to work everyday with the old, bald shirtless guy. I honestly am not sure what the ad is even for. All I know is there is a bald, old guy with way too much chest hair and wrinkly skin running on a beach and smiling at me. This makes me a little uncomfortable. Not altar boy uncomfortable, but uncomfortable nonetheless.
2. The GM of the White Sox, Kenny Williams, blasted Frank Thomas yesterday. I mean blasted him!
   "He's an idiot. He's selfish. That's why we don't miss him," Williams said.
   "We don't miss his attitude. We don't miss the whining. We don't miss it. Good riddance. See you later."
   "He brought us to this point. So, OK, you want to play this game? You've got it. You got it. He's the Oakland A's problem right now. ... He better stay out of our business. He better stay out of White Sox business."
   If that's not entertaining offseason stuff, I don't know what is...
   We need more of that in sports. Raw emotion, pure passion and unfiltered hatred of individuals...
3. I heard this one on the radio - I swear - you couldn't make this up. No, not even I could make this up:
   Some guy in Middle of Nowhere, Pennsylvania went into a convenience store and asked to use the microwave. The clerk acquiesced and the man put his item in the microwave and went to the bathroom. After a minute a funny smell started to fill the store causing the clerk to immediately think to herself - "hmm, I wonder what that strange man put in the microwave. I better go check." Which of course she did.
   Ok... you want to know what was in there... You only want to know because you don't know... If you knew you'd be upset...
   I had 3 immediate questions once I found out what the clerk discovered upon opening the microwave.
   a. Whose was it? Did it belong to the man who entered the store (who immediately fled and was not captured)?
   b. What would be the purpose of microwaving it? Was he merely warming it up or was he trying to make it explode or shrink or something else?
   c. Was he going to eat it or did he have another use in mind for this now heated up item?
   Ok, you want to know what it is... The woman opened the microwave to find a severed human penis. HOLY SH**!!!!!!! That sounds just as bad when I write it as when I heard it! Good luck keeping your lunch down.
4. The last couple of days have been very cold in New York. Particularly yesterday was about 17 degrees below mother frikkin freezing. Yet for some reason people are willing to sacrifice their health and limbs driving 50 mph in this weather just to be able to smoke out the window of their car.
   A couple of quick points on this:
   a. Is it necessary to have the window open if nobody else is in the car? I'm not a smoker. Never have been, so I just don't know. But it would seem to me, that in such frigid temperatures - either don't smoke, or suck it up and close the windows. It's not like the cancer gets blown out with the wind, it's still building its home in your throat and lungs.
   b. Can you smoke with gloves? Again, I don't know if this is a viable option, but I had to reach my hand out my window for 1.28 seconds to swipe my card and open the gate at the garage in my work building and I thought I was going to die. That was with a stopped car. Imagine these people driving 55-65 mph with their arms hanging out the window. After that experience you could probably give a high five and shatter your hand into pieces.
   Maybe I'm naive, but the whole thing just doesn't make sense to me.

Anyway, that's my thoughts for this morning. Back to work...