Things I Root For…

Any team playing against a team from Boston…

The economic destruction of the company that produced Barney…

Another outbreak of mad cow disease in England…

My kid to become addicted to ESPN instead of PBS…

Cow-tippers…

Tough bodybuilding Aussies to come out of the closet so they can’t call us wimpy Yanks anymore…

Political unrest and civil war in terrorist-run Middle Eastern countries…

Skinny, rookie place-kickers to miss a field goal with the game on the line…

Famous rich people to get addicted to drugs and make fools of themselves…

Gang wars…

People who drive recklessly at a time when people are driving with their kids to get pulled over, or at least to get into an accident with another reckless driver…

The kids from “Barney’s Backyard Gang” to become drug addicts and alcoholics in their later teenage years…

Tough guys and bullies to get a hernia; this way they can see what having big balls is really like…

People who let their dogs crap without cleaning it up to get crapped on by a bird as I am walking past, so I can laugh at them…

Sharks (especially when they are playing against the surfers; hey - gotta root for the home team)…

Feel free to add to the list...