Dr. Brown's Revisited

You may remember my analysis of the King of all Beverages, Dr. Brown's Black Cherry Soda. If not, it's a special piece, check it out here.

Anyway, recently Dr. Brown's has done something quite controversial and something that indeed alters the course of humanity. They have created a 2 liter bottle. This has never been done before. Furthermore, these bottles are selling for an affordable 99 cents at your local supermarket.

Now my immediate thought on this new innovation was "great! I can now buy Dr. Brown's in bulk and not mortgage my future at 7-11 trying to buy the tiny little bottles, or buying a can for $12 at the Kosher Deli." However, after sitting and thinking over the ramifications of this new product, I am a bit disturbed by the introduction of such an affordable and easy-access bottle of Dr. Brown's.

It used to be that Dr. Brown's was not accessible by just anyone. A regular Joe on the street could not just decided to spend his 75 cents in the soda machine and taste heaven. Now all of a sudden Dr. Brown's has gone from an expensive, naturally blonde lady escort, to a chubby, Hunter's Point, cheap crack whore... and I don't like it! 99 cents? Are you kidding me? You're worth more than that. Where is your self-respect young lady?!? This is no way to go through life! What are you - Dr. Pepper?!?

Yet as much as I scream and yell about it, this is the choice the Dr. Brown's people have made. This is what it has come to. No longer can only upscale suburban Deli-frequenting people enjoy an iced cold glass of Dr. Brown's with their pastrami sandwich on rye and french fries... Now even minorities can drink this sweet nectar of freedom. Alas, the world is changing around us.

Now of course, I make my trips to the supermarket and buy my 99 cent bottles of Dr. Brown's like everyone else, but now I am just one of the crowd instead of one of the select few. The next problem becomes the excasterbation (yes that is a clean word, I looked it up once) of the one weakness that Dr. Brown's has always possessed. Like all superheroes, Dr. Brown's possesses one flaw that could technically ruin its otherwise perfect being. Dr. Brown's does not last well once opened. It is meant to be enjoyed and consumed in one sitting. That is probably the reason that, to this point, it has only been available in cans and small bottles. Now, when I buy the 99 cent bottle, I generally can only drink about half in one-sitting. This means that a half a bottle of Dr. Brown's is being wasted. That, my good friends, is NOT cool.

We will be holding an intervention for Dr. Brown. Apparently he is doing too much crack and that is why he is offering it up for so cheap. We need to convince Dr. Brown that he IS classy and he is NOT a cheap drink to be enjoyed with a cheap piece of meat. Hell NO! He is to be enjoyed only in the finest Delis in NYC and by people who are willing to spend $2.75 on a 1 liter bottle of soda.

Stay tuned, if this intervention does not work, I will ask you to join a revolution. We will cleanse the world of this cheapness and restore glory to the beverage we once adored and knew so well. It's amazing how fast things can change, we must fight, we must survive.

In a related story, I have been told by a reliable source that Diet Cel-Ray (yes, that would be a soda, made by Dr. Brown's, that tasted like celery...diet celery somehow) has been discontinued. Now my grandfather and his old/dead friends are going to be pissed. Too bad he can't turn on a computer, let alone express his thoughts on the topic in a guest blog. If Fresca gets discontinued, someone might really have to put him on a suicide watch.

I Got Nothing...

I legitimately have nothing to write about today. It's 4:58pm and I am sitting in my office. Most of the employees of the firm on rushing to finish what they are working on to make sure they don't leave later than 5 sharp, which I guess is good because that means the firm isn't wasting my potential bonus money paying overtime to slow workers. I, of course, don't even get to look at the clock and contemplate leaving for another couple of hours. It's not even like I have to pretend to be busy. I have a pretty big project sitting in front of me. The only problem is, it does not have to be done until tomorrow, which of course means, it will be done tomorrow.

So I'm back to sitting here with nothing to write about. I worked my ass of today hitting a bunch of deadlines on different deals I am working on, and am rewarding myself with a good 15 minutes of slacking off. I figured I'd come up with some kind of random thought to write down and expand into a rambling essay of garbage (like I usually do), but nothing seems to be hitting me. Hurricane Katrina is so yesterday's news. Nobody cared about those people then, and we certainly don't give a rat's ass now. Hey, Governor told you to get your dumb ass out of there, you chose not to listen - don't come crying to us now that it's because your black and everyone's racist. Here's some advice for next time... when every member of government leaves, and all the white people start to leave too.........GET THE F*** OUT!

Next idea was Hurricane Rita. Only problem with that is - Hurricane Rita in and of itself is funnier than anything I can come up with. Just watch the news reporters talking about all the people getting hit twice in Louisiana and all the evacuated people having to evacuate the places they evacuated to. Reality TV doesn't get much better or humorous than that. And of course since we know none of those poor souls, their desperate and trying times entertain, and sometimes even amuse us.

Anyway, time's up... I'm full of crap, yet you still read. Whatever.

Dear E-mail Provider,

Today I spent a lovely 25 minutes on the phone saying "what" and "repeat that please" to your wonderful and competent employee in Mumbai, India. Apparently, anybody who is smart enough to escape the large-scale flooding and constant tidal waves in that country is smart enough to be on your tech-support team. I won't tell you his name (not because I care if he is fired, mind you, but rather because I didn't give a crap what his name was when he told me, and I sure as hell don't care now), but he did not know his ass from his elbow when it came to computers.

I have what would be considered a very minor issue with my email. I am unable to send emails to a group of more than 5 people. This problem surfaced yesterday and will probably last 3 or 4 days. The only reason I bothered calling you is because I'd prefer for it to be fixed immediately. I have had this problem in the past. What occurs is (and make sure you relay this message to the half-retards you have over in tech-support), when you send a certain number of group emails within a certain period of time (of which I did a lot), the email system will start to recognize your group emails as spam, even if this is not the case (which it is not).

Now, please understand, these emails I send are extremely important. They focus on the very fabric of American society, and contain important research that I am doing for the EDS Sports Bureau of North America. I was conducting a group survey among friends and family members regarding the American League East and the American League MVP. Your employee over in the Far-East (or wherever the hell India is), did not seem to comprehend the importance of these issues, and their constant need for debate and discussion. Surely, you will understand.

As I write this letter I just now received your "tech support follow-up" email. This email thanks me for contacting you, and says if I have further problems to go to live support. This is interesting, because my next point was going to be how your tech-support guy, who incidentally, is probably too stupid to serve slurpies in 7-11 (no racial pun intended there...ok fine, there was), never actually was able to fix this simple problem. Instead he asked all kinds of stupid and irrelevant questions about my computer and internet connection. Now, I know close to nothing about these kinds of problems, yet I was able to tell him exactly what the problem was and how it needs to be fixed. This Einstein ignored me and asked his protocol questions anyway. Well at least you know the Indians follow directions well. I have a feeling if this job had not been outsourced, my problem would already be fixed.

Needless to say I am not pleased with this so-called "customer service" and am quite upset about the fact that your Indian friend told me it will probably take 24-48 hours to get a "real tech-support technician" (I swear that's what he called it) to look at my problem. Why can't I reach one of these people now? Oh and just a tip, if you are going to outsource this work to make it cheaper for you... in order to avoid pissing off customers (like myself) because your customer service people are dumber than Paris Hilton around video cameras, outsource to China. At least those people are 1. smart, 2. are used to working ridiculous hours for little or no pay, 3. are little (so you can pay them half the salary of an Indian, because they are half the size), and 4. even though I may not understand any of the "words coming out their moufs", at least I can take solace in the fact that if they do not fix my problem, a Chinese government representative will probably beat the ever-loving crap out them and their families. At least then I know someone cares about my problem. Oh and 5. Their names are a lot shorter than Indian names.

Thank you for your time,
EDS

Final Point on MVP

Here's how I see it, then I'm done with this conversation and onto something more entertaining...Hopefully...

:::::::::: Offense Value ::::: Defense Value::::::::::::::::
:::::::::::::: (0-100) ::::::::::::: (0-100)::::::::::::::::::::

A-Rod :::::::: ?? :::::::::::::::::::::: 100 ::::::::::::::::

Papi :::::::: 100 :::::::::::::::::::::: 0 ::::::::::::::::

To explain: In this chart, you rate each player's value in each half of the game to their team as compared to other major league players. The lowest rating is 0, the highest rating would be 100. A 100 rating would be reserved for those who are the best in the league at that particular aspect of the game. For example, Ortiz gets a rating of 100 in the category of offense, because there are no players with better numbers than he has on a contending team. A-Rod obtains a 100 rating on defense, because he is the best player defensively at one of the most demanding positions. Ortiz gets a big fat 0 on defense, because his silly ass sits on the bench while his team is on the field.

I have left A-Rod's Offense Value blank. Feel free to fill it in. I would probably place it at around a 98. I can conceivable see people weighing different offensive statistics in different ways and therefore left it blank. Bottom line, I cannot reasonably see anyone putting him below 90. If that's the case, then there is no argument as to MVP. To me, a DH will always have to have startlingly better numbers than the runner-up position player. Which is probably why a DH has never won an MVP award.

AROD - Read it and weep, haters!

Today I decided to put my money where my mouth is. I have contended all year that people are overestimating how many homeruns and RBIs ARod has in meaningless blowout games. I have gone so far as to say that David Ortiz (whom ARod is in a race with for MVP, despite the fact that Hideki Matsui should win this award, but enough on that for now...) probably has the same amount of meaningless homeruns and RBIs if ever anyone bothered to look.

So... I bothered to look... and I was shocked to find that not only was I right, but ARod comes out of this looking far better than I keep portraying him. And for those of you who know me, I've not only been on the ARod bandwagon, I'm practically driving the damn thing.

Here's how my research went today...

Initial Research
OK, I did some research... You "ARod only hits homers in blowouts" people are not going to like this. I spent the last 15 minutes while I ate my mac and cheese researching this stat to disprove all of you idiots.

This year - the yanks have played in 40 games where they won or lost by 5 or more runs. These were games I considered "blowouts" to some extent (even though as I look back and remember some of them - i.e. the 13 run 8th inning comeback - they were not all blowouts, but for purposes of this stat, I added them in anyway).

In these 40 "blowout" games, ARod has hit 16 Homers. NOW WAIT!!!

3 of them were against Bartolo Colon in one game. Those do NOT count, because each one was clutcher than the next given the situation... So 13 in 39 games let's say. STILL WAIT!!!

Further research shows that 9 of these 13 home runs came at a point in the game where they yanks were either, down, tied, or ahead by less than 5 runs. In other words, they were not "blowout home runs" - I have not checked Papi's stats on that yet, but I plan to soon.

ARod has hit a grand total of 4 meaningless homeruns this year. Out of 45??? That's not a stat-padder. That's an MVP... I'll check on Papi and get back to ya'all.

15 minutes later
Boston has played 44 of these "blowout" games.

Papi has hit the same 16 home runs in those "blowout" games, BUT!!!!!!

Only 7 of Pap's homeruns were meaningful homers as defined earlier. Papi has hit 9 meaningless homers, compared to ARod's 4.

Now, nobody would dare say Papi only hits homers in blowouts, but it appears that he does so more than ARod... That argument is no longer valid. I am still accepting other tries!

Side point - through this research I learned that Manny Ramirez is the king of meaningless homers, I didnt keep track, but almost every blowout game he has a late homer that means nothing... That said, he's still one of the top, if not the top, right-handed hitter of the last 20+ years.

25 minutes later...
I am so over Ortiz right now it's not even funny... I'm glad he's clutch and all, because without the game-winners he's been hitting lately... man, would you guys be on his case... I'm sure you would, because you're obviously reasonable, rational, smart people... and hey if ARod's hits are mostly not clutch and in not-close games and we bash him, surely we should bash Ortiz for the same... ya ready?

In the same "not-close" or "blowout" (or meaningless) games:

Papi - 66 RBIs
ARod - 50 RBIs - and that includes the 10 against Colon...

And just to make it worse for Papi, he has at least 10 blowout games with 4,5, or 6 RBIs. ARod has 3 games of such.

Now, I no longer want to hear the "ARod gets all his RBIs and homers in blowouts and gets them in bunches in those blowouts to pad his stats" arguments.

I'm done with dis guy, NEXT!

This is more and more becoming a one-horse race to me. I am basically now only keeping Ortiz in this conversation BECAUSE of his clutch hits... it no longer provides an edge, it merely keeps him from being ridiculed as a stat-padder...

Conclusion:
This whole post is not meant to argue the fact that ARod is not nearly as clutch as he should be for the talent he possesses. That's a given. I concede that point and my only argument against Ortiz for MVP on that note is ARod's gold glove caliber and game-saving clutchness in the field all year. To me, that plus the fact that Ortiz sits his fat carcass on the bench for half the game, far outweighs the 7 or 8 game tying or winning homers that he has hit this year.

This post is meant to disprove the rest of the crap you anti-ARod people like to throw out there because he makes more money in a day than we all make in 10 years. Bottomline, he is freaking awesome and his stats are far from meaningless.

I've now gone through the 150 or so games that each team has played... twice... ARod is far more valuable to the Yanks, than Ortiz is to the Sox.... In fact, without the game-winners (I think there are 6 or 7 this year by him, could be wrong on that), I'd venture to say there is an argument that Ortiz is not even the MVP on his own team (ala Damon and Manny)...

ARod is clearly not the MVP on his own team (Matsui, Giambi, Sheffield)... but that's an argument for another day. This whole thing simply concerns the relevant race at hand between ARod and Big Papi.

AL Races

Bubba Crosby!!! What the hell?

And... was I the only one who was afraid that Papi was going to hit a 3 run homer last night with no one on base and two outs in the bottom of the ninth down 2 runs? I know there was no one on, but the kind of season he's having, stuff could be made up, that's all I'm saying.

Anyway, I wanted to say my piece on the MVP race in the AL. I was never an ARod fan though I've become one over the year. I know his ability and numbers seems to shrink in the clutch, but the bottomline is, you need guys to put up consistent numbers as well, and he's one of those guys. All the runs count. The .320, 43 and 100+ RBI's all matter. Just because they never seem to occur at the end of a game, doesn't mean those hits and runs didn't keep the game close for Matsui or Giambi (or Crosby or Escalona) to win it later on. While he may be far behind in clutch hits to Papi, ARod is still this year's AL MVP, and it isn't even close between those two.

While Ortiz may carry his team offensively in some games, lately more often than not, and hit some clutch home runs to tie and win games, he does not play defense. To me, the difference in clutch hits is easily made up by ARod in the field. Forget the fact that he plays the field (which to me just makes it more of an easy pick), he makes game saving plays in the field. He plays a gold glove caliber third base. He is flat out awesome out there.

Ortiz does not even play the field, which to me is a HUGE negative in the MVP race because it takes away half of the game. To make up for that missing half, Ortiz would have to out-offense ARod by a lot (not necessarily two times as much, but significantly). The only argument I've heard for Ortiz is the clutch hits argument, and like I said, ARod has been as clutch in the field as Papi has been swinging. And let's put aside the fun it is to bash ARod, he's had some pretty big hits the last couple of weeks with things getting tight.

Now we all love to concentrate on ARod's lack of being clutch. Let me just so throw numbers out there that maybe we ignore.
He is batting .429 with bases loaded.
Man on 3rd less than two outs, he is hitting .320
Men on, 2 outs, he is hitting .283
RISP, .289

In the interest of fairness, Ortiz has better numbers in a few of those categories. However, those numbers were not being used to make the point of ARod versus Ortiz... No, no, no... that debate has been settled.

How can ARod be the MVP of the league, if he is not MVP of his own team?
Hideki Matsui - plays the field, puts up consistent numbers (.300, 21, 110) and puts himself over the hump with the clutch hitting. How many times has ARod left a man stranded with less than 2 outs only to have Matsui bail him out with one of his 42 doubles.
Matsui - with bases loaded - .471
Man on 3rd, less than 2 out - .462
RISP - .300

Pretty good numbers. ARod is the better player, Matsui may just be more valuable...

Seriously Bro...

This whole thing was a bad idea... What the hell was going through Ariel Sharon's mind?

It's not enough that there are about 200 uncivilized, Islamic fundamentalist regimes surrounding you that are full of poverty, violence and inhumane living conditions. It was a good idea to create one within your direct vicinity?

When will people learn from the past?
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Gaza chaos creating Palestinian political crisis
Prime Minister under fire over failure of security forces to control disorder

RAMALLAH, West Bank - Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas faced a brewing political crisis on Thursday as he scrambled to quell chaos in Gaza following Israel's withdrawal from the territory.

Lawmakers submitted a request for a no-confidence vote against Prime Minister Ahmed Qurie and his Cabinet, all Abbas appointees, in protest at the failure of security forces to control lawlessness after 38 years of Israeli occupation.

Abbas can ill afford further political instability as he struggles to impose order in the Gaza Strip, which is seen as a proving ground for Palestinian aspirations of statehood.

Abbas has warned militants that armed chaos would not be tolerated but has not specified how he plans to combat it. Israel and Washington demand he disarm militant groups that he has coaxed into an eight-month-old cease-fire.

Thousands of Islamic Jihad militants marched in the former central Gaza settlement of Netzarim on Thursday, firing assault rifles into the air, in the biggest show of force by gunmen defying Abbas since settlers departed last month.

Palestinian security forces stood virtually powerless while gunmen and ordinary Gazans stormed the evacuated enclaves, smashing synagogues and looting.
>>

My only thought is that Sharon took a big step to make a (hopefully) final and big point. Maybe his idea is that since this is supposed to be the proving ground for the creation of a Palestinian state, this is a way of ensuring it will never happen. I mean, even the retarded kid in my Synagoge that drools during the prayer services knows that allowing the Palestinians to have authority over Gaza means that in a week it will be a craphole that looks like a third-world country after it has been through a natural disaster.

Here's an idea... and really try this, because you will be amazed at how right I am - In about 2 weeks look for before and after pictures from Gaza. I promise when you look at the before, you will see nice settlements and villages with houses and stores and other buildings. When you look at the after, I guarantee you see shacks, and burned down buildings and animals roaming in the streets and crapping on the sidewalks (which will be paved only because the Palestinians probably couldn't figure out how to light pavement on fire).

Now, if I was suddenly given access to a land that I had been coveting for the last 38 years, and someone much smarter and more capable than I had built this land up beautifully and perhaps even managed to have the land produce as well, I'd probably sit down with a few smart people and discuss how to go about maintaining the great condition our land is in. We'd make all kinds of committees to allow for a continuation of production from the land, and to provide new uses for obsolete and irrelevant structures.
However, the Palestinians' approach - "Let's go burn all the Jewish stuff and then throw rocks at the huge tanks over there on the hill. Hooray!" Brilliant. This is why the borders in Israel all smell like piss.

WTF?!?

Even I have nothing to add to this story, except - Are you freakin kidding me?

...all i did was bold some of the parts I found to be particularly entertaining...err...disturbing.
<<
Eleven kids found in cages in home
Couple denies abusing or neglecting children

WAKEMAN, Ohio - Sheriff’s deputies found 11 children locked in cages less than 3½ feet high inside a home, but a couple denied they had abused or neglected the children.

A judge on Monday put the children — who range in age from 1 to 14 and who have various disabilities, including autism — in foster homes.

The children were found in nine cages built into the walls of the house near this small city in northern Ohio, according to the Huron County Sheriff’s Office. They had no blankets or pillows, and the cages were rigged with alarms that sounded if opened, Lt. Randy Sommers said.

The children told authorities they slept in the cages — 40 inches high and 40 inches deep — at night. Doors to some of the cages were blocked with heavy furniture.

Sharen and Mike Gravelle are adoptive or foster parents for all 11 children, officials said. Prosecutors were reviewing the case, but no charges had been filed as of Monday night.
A children’s services investigator saw one of the children in a cage Friday, Sommers said. The sheriff’s office obtained a warrant and returned to the house that evening and removed the children.

The Gravelles do not have a listed telephone number.
A woman who identified herself as Sharen Gravelle’s mother but would not give her name said the children were happy in their new home.

“This year they have played and had fun and laughed like no other children have, which they have never been able to do,” she said.

At a hearing, the judge placed the children in the custody of the Department of Job and Family Services, and officials placed them in four foster homes, said county Juvenile Court Administrator Chris Mushett.
Appearing with a lawyer at the hearing, the Gravelles denied they had abused or neglected the children.

County Prosecutor Russell Leffler said the Gravelles claimed a psychiatrist recommended they place the children in cages.

The couple were reserved when deputies arrived at the house to remove the children, Sommers said.
“The impression that we got was that they felt it was OK,” he said.

Investigators believe nine of the children slept in the cages that were stacked two-high on the house’s second story. Two mattresses on a bedroom floor also showed signs of recent use, Sommers said.

One of the boys said he’d slept in the cage for three years, Sommers said.
Wakeman, with a population of about 1,000, is some 50 miles west of Cleveland.
>>
This story is from http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9319446/ in case you're interested in checking it out...

Drowning Palestinians

I borrowed this piece from my buddy Noyam because it captures my own thoughts on the matter. I added in a few comments at the end.
<<
Where's The Outrage?

I was reading Metro on the subway into work this morning...(by the way, I can really see every blog post starting with that line from now on. In fact, I may change the blog's tagline to that.) and I caught this line, "Egyptian border guards shot dead one palestinian, and three others, who did not know how to swim, drowned after jumping in the ocean."I was both pissed and cracking up at the same time.

First, why I was pissed (the cracking up you can probably guess, if you aren't already laughing to yourself):

If the Palestinians who stormed the Egyptian border to celebrate their new freedom, had stormed the Israeli border instead, and the one who got shot dead was shot by an Israeli and not an Egyption soldier, that item isn't part of a compound sentence, buried in middle of a paragraph, in an article "Gazans celebrate first day of freedom" (Metro uses lowercase in the headline, so do I).
No, no, that's front page news, under some headline reading something like, "Violence Mars Israeli Pullout" or "Border Skirmish in Gaza." So why is it thrown away here? Why does Egypt get to protect its border from storming Palestinians without world reaction, but Israel doesn't?

That's why I'm pissed. Remember this next time a Gazan is killed by an Israeli soldier returning fire at the border crossing. Just remember it.

As for why I'm laughing? Well, my sick sense of humor finds something terribly amusing, in that "skimming the Darwinian gene pool" sort of way, in three people who can't swim jumping into the ocean.By the way, the juxtaposition of the two deaths just serves to lighten the border shooting.
>>

Palestinians drowning is always funny... you see what they did to the leftover Synagogues in Gaza?

Ridiculous.

Truth is it's Israel's own fault for not taking them down before evacuating and handing over.
Big mistake. They had to know it would happen.

My Mom said it best yesterday when I spoke to her: There is something ironic about the fact that European nations that find old Synagogues and Jewish burial sites take care to protect them and ask Israel's advice on how to go about dealing with these places (mostly out of fear of political fallout), yet Israel herself can't protect her own sacred places from desecration by those animals. Just a thought...

Hurricane

Well, it has certainly been a while since I've rambled on here. I'm eating lunch now and was reading a couple of blogs I keep up with (not the moronic ones they always refer to on CNN, though one day I hope mine gets on there by accident), and decided to post some thoughts.

Now that I've started my full-time job as a lawyer it becomes slightly more complicated to post on here. Many of you may have noticed that over the last year or so I've hit some sensitive and controversial topics without much care. This is in part because I try to keep the blog anonymous, though most of you readers know me, and because frankly, I don't really give a damn what other people think. If you can't tell an attempt at humor from an actually held belief, then you shouldn't read this blog, rather - you should probably consider a swim in the contaminated waters of New Orleans.

Anyway, since I've started work, I feel like it might be necessary to tone it down a bit, or perhaps censor myself a little bit more. I have only shared this blog with one of the partners at my firm, and don't really plan to share it with others at this point in time for obvious reasons.

With that in mind, here are my censored and toned down remarks on Hurricane Katrina:

First question - Why is it that everyone is afraid to say on TV that it seems that all the refugees in New Orleans are -----? It's pretty freakin obvious everytime you flip past a news channel. Are they afraid that if they keep calling it the poor area, and at the same time say mostly ------ were affected that Al -------- or Jesse ------- will open a 50 gallon drum of whoop-ass on them?

Second question - this has a lot to do with the first question. Am I the only one to notice that all the white people seemed to get out? Whenever they interview an evacuee it's a white person, when they interview a remaining survivor tredding contaminated water it's a ----- person.

Third question - Why do I feel the need to use dashes everytime I refer to ----- people, but not to white people - just a side point I'm curious about if anyone has a good answer.

Back to the Hurricane. How long is it necessary to wait till we can start making jokes? I shouldn't say "we" - I already spent last Sunday in the pool pretending to be Hurricane Katrina and dragging my younger cousins and siblings under water - I should say, how long till most people would think it's ok? I figure while the relief effort is ongoing, it's probably off limits. But then I remember 2 points which make me think otherwise - 1. nobody waited for Terri Schiavo to die to make fun of her and her ridiculous family, and 2. nobody seems to really care about the people left behind in New Orleans except Fox News (fair and balanced). The Mayor and Governor are long gone and already are focusing on rebuilding the city (probably right on top of all the dead ----- people). The government doesn't give a crap as evidenced from their not-so-quick response to the whole situation. (For the love of god, President Bush didn't even come back from his vacation for an extra day or so after the hurricane. He probably got a call from the White House:

Offical White House President Caller: "Mr. President, there's been a disastrous hurricane in New Orleans and parts of Mississippi, tons of ----- people and KKK members have been wiped out and many others are drowning as we speak."

President Bush: "That's great! Give me a follow up tomorrow." Click

They probably had to call him back the next day and emphasize the fact that he is the President of all the people, not just the ones he likes. (I criticize even though I happen to like W - stupid people amuse me, stupid people with power...now THAT'S entertainment!)

If this is the case, and nobody seems to care, then maybe, just maybe, certain parts can be considered funny? Just a thought.

Well, I have much more to say, but unfortunately my lunch is all gone and I have a ton of work to do so that I don't end up here till all hours of the night because I wasted my time trying to entertain all you simpletons. More to come eventually.